13 Signs That You Should Not Be With Someone

NOTE: this is written from a girl's perspective, but to the guys reading, this might be applicable to you! this is my opinion after witnessing and experiencing some things the past couple of years in high school and college. so if you offer a rebuttal, I'm all up for listening.

1. He has A LOT of friends that are girls. Yes, I wholeheartedly believe that you can be just friends with someone of the opposite sex. I have a lot of guy friends whom I am not involved with romantically and don't intend on being with. But just think about it. How do most relationships start? Friendship. Usually if you want to be in a relationship with someone, you start out as friends and see where that goes. So if your guy has a lot of friends that are girls, just trust me, at least of one of those girls he has at least thought about taking the friendship with to the next level (besides you).

2. He doesn't share the same beliefs as you. It seems like a minor issue, but you're probably hoping and wishing that he believed in the same things as you, and it could cause potential problems in the future. If you have to compromise your beliefs to make the relationship work, just really think about if it's actually worth it. (personal example: I'm a very religious person and I like going to church, so I would like my guy to have similar beliefs as me and want to go to church with me. I shouldn't have to put God and church on the back-burner for him.)

3. You feel like a side chick. I like this definition I saw on Urban dictionary.

Basically, you are not as special and important to him as you'd like. I'm not saying that he is supposed to be obsessing over you 24/7, but you just know he doesn't think of you as a priority. There might even be another girl in his life who he likes more. Do you guys kinda understand what I mean? If you feel like a side chick, you probably are. (Some of the reasons below kinda fall under this "side chick" category.)

4. He doesn't want to meet your family. Or he doesn't want you to meet his. If meeting family is "too much" or "too serious" for him, then you should probably reevaluate the relationship, especially if family is important to you and you thought this relationship was becoming serious.

5. He doesn't want to hang out with you in public. You only find yourselves hanging out in each other's homes; never out and about. "Netflix and chill" is apparently a thing nowadays and can be cool, but if that's literally all you guys do, that sounds more like a friend with benefits. Or he's just bored and using you.

6. He only wants to hang out with you at ungodly hours. To put it bluntly, you're probably just a booty call to him. If he only texts you at 2 o'clock in the morning asking if you wanna come over, just go ahead and say, "BYE FELICIA!" *insert sassy girl emoji*

7. Your friends don't approve of him. When you're with someone you really like, you tend to see things differently than your friends because you're probably super infatuated with this guy. Your friends might see it from a more realistic, less biased perspective. If they think this guy you're with is no good, they're probably right.

8. You feel like you're settling. No one is perfect, but if you feel like you deserve better, you definitely can do better! NEVER SETTLE FOR LESS.

9. Your gut feeling is telling you something is wrong. Okay, okay, this can be questionable because some people (usually girls) tend to overreact and freak out over nothing. But I believe that if you're meant to be with someone, you shouldn't feel any iffiness or suspicion about what your guy might be doing. You should be able to trust him completely and if you feel like you can't or something doesn't feel right, and you just know it's not you going crazy, then there is probably something wrong.

10. He doesn't want to get into a relationship. If your guy says he's not ready to be in a relationship, just stop there. Either be strictly friends and cut all emotional ties with him, or go back to being strangers. If you think you can just wait and play around with him until he is ready, there is always a chance of him leaving and even meeting someone who is a "better fit". Or he might decide he doesn't like you at all. And you can't really be upset about it because you both were never Facebook official, right? :P You don't need to hang onto someone who is unsure about getting serious with you!

11. He won't help you when you need it. Just imagine you're stuck in a situation and you call him and he won't help for reasons other than he's actually asleep/out-of-town/throwing up/dead. A key thing in a relationship is being able to rely on each other and trust each other when you might actually need help. If he's not willing to help now, what makes you think he's going to help you in the future?

12. He's been verbally or physically abusive to you. NEVER, EVER, EVER, is there going to be a reason for a guy to hit you and yell at you. You are a human and deserve to be respected. If he hits you, curses at you, or anything related to that, drop him, cut all communication with him ASAP, and pray for him. There is no excuse for that sort of behavior.

13. He makes you anxious and depressed. If he is affecting your mental health in a negative way, that's not a good thing. Anxiety and depression are serious and a guy shouldn't be the reason for it.

I hope this list is helpful because I feel like we live in a world today where we are impatient to meet someone and not be alone, but then often just settle for a person whom we're not supposed to be with. Don't waste time on someone you're not sure about!

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